the problem with always being available

i seem to be always available.
whenever someone is upset,
they talk to me,
which im fine with,
but who talks to me when I'm upset?

Don't get me wrong, I have no problem letting someone vent to me. In fact, I feel honored that someone had the guts to reach out to me and speak about whatever is going on with them. Its hard to be vulnerable. To them, I am their "person"
But... why is that never reciprocated? where is my person? Do I even have one? I am not sure.

I try to not beat myself up about the fact I don't have someone. I am good at holding everything in. I can smile, and talk to you like I am doing perfectly fine.
I am scared of letting someone know what hurts me. Not everyone is a genuine person, some are just nosey. They do not care about you, they just want to know whats going on. People will pretend to care and then go and tell everyone what is going on with you. I just don't like being vulnerable. So, maybe they think I don't need my person?

A lot of people who are older than I am seem to say one thing in perticular to me... "what do you have to be upset about as a teenager? Your life isnt hard. Wait until you become an adult."
That saying about how you never know what someone is going through is cliché, but true.

The truth is, you will never be able to understand exactly what someone is going through.
You'll never understand why they hurt so much.
Until it's you.
Until you are the one hitting rock bottom and then you finally see.
What made them so upset.
And then it hits you.
It's not about understanding.
It's about being there for someone when they need you.
It's about being their person.